Mike Huckabee 

If you thought your dad made bad dad jokes, here is something that will make you feel better. It also explains why Sarah Huckabee Sanders looks so angry all the time. She’s obviously traumatized from decades of unfunny dad jokes. Such an experience is enough to turn anyone into a cynical lizard-person.

Huckster’s dad-joke game on fleek.

Donald Trump Jr.

The oily-haired pea-brained Don Jr. is an obvious choice. Though not as compulsive a tweeter as his father, using the word lit to describe the retirement of a Supreme (as Michelle Wolf calls them) is probably the douchiest thing since I have seen on Twitter or ever will see. Please make it stop.

Don Jr., the penultimate frat-boy.

The President of the United States

It might seem biased to give two Trumps a place on a list of just three douchy things, but but our president’s tweets (twatted in quick succession) reveal how little he knows about any of the GOP contenders he’s blindly endorsing.

There are at least 50 more tweets claiming “so-and-so” loves our military.

Sometimes I wish there was a god, so I’d at least feel as though there were someone I could ask to yank these clowns out of the public eye so that our country can go one day without being made a laughingstock on the world stage.